If a childÆs soccer experience befuddles the parents, thereÆs a place in cyberspace that will try to help.
The youth-soccer boom resounds with disturbing youth-soccer echoes: overzealous coaches, overindulgent parents, player burnout and dozens of related issues. For years, parents seeking advice or solutions have been limited to club meetings, sideline powwows or a handful of books.
The Internet promises to change all that. The Center for Sports Parenting, a Web-based program affiliated with the University of Rhode IslandÆs Institute for International Sport, quietly but efficiently offers a broad menu of interactive resources.
Its mission is to provide parents, coaches, educators, officials and others interested in youth sports with fingertip access to child and sports psychologists, physicians, nutritionists, sociologists, attorneys, educators, even college and professional athletics experts.
The site (www.sportsparenting.org) allows anyone to e-mail questions to renowned panel members and receive a personal response. Questions and answers are then posted on the site.
According to David Brennan, director of the Center for Sports Parenting, many queries relate specifically to youth soccer.
ôThey donÆt just ask simple questions,ö he says. ôWe get long, involved stories.ö
Many of those questions involve travel teams.
ôSo many dilemmas come from conflicts when kids play on more than one team,ö Brennan says. ôA kid will go to team AÆs practice, and then the coach of team B will limit the childÆs playing time. Balancing kidsÆ schedules ù and the fairness of commitment and everything related to that ù seems to be a huge issue in soccer.ö
Brennan added that a number of youth soccer players play on ôthree, four or even fiveö teams.
Specialization is another of the siteÆs hot topics. Compared to many sports, Brennan said, soccer coaches seem to demand specialization at an early age. Parents want to know whether concentrating on one sport is better than playing several. A related topic, burnout, is also frequently addressed.
Other subjects include integrating sports and academic pursuits, winning and losing, and negative motivation.
Parents also wonder how to address other parentsÆ behavior. As media coverage of ôsideline rageö has increased, so have such questions as the proper response when a neighbor yells at the referee, or what to do when a good friend sits in the stands and critiques other childrenÆs performances.
ôA lot of this comes from adults who live their own athletic successes vicariously through their kids. Or else they try to have experiences they missed themselves,ö Brennan said. ôItÆs a tricky area, and up to now it hasnÆt been talked about too much.ö
Daryl J. Burnett, a California-based sports psychologist and youth coach, has noticed that even inclusive, recreation-oriented organizations such as American Youth Soccer Organization (AYSO) must deal with increasing parental angst and pressures.
ôSoccer is no longer just a game,ö he said. ôSome parents are thinking way ahead, to travel teams and college scholarships.ö
Part of the reason parents and coaches may act inappropriately, Burnett said, is that there have been few consequences in the youth-sports world.
ôThere are in the workplace and on the freeway,ö he says, ôbut until very recently people sort of had free rein on the field.ö
He noted that many of the questions he receives deal with unruly parents and coaches.
ôVery few people are asking about sportsmanship issues,ö he said. ôItÆs almost like thatÆs been forgotten.ö
The concept of a Center for Sports Parenting arose during discussions between Institute for International Sport executive director Dan Doyle and Rick Wolff, who covers youth-sports issues for Sports Illustrated.
Wolff, who became chairman of the center, envisioned a ônational clearinghouse of expert advice and information.ö
The site has other features besides its expert panel. Interactive Webcasts offer monthly opportunities to communicate in real time with guest experts. Recent topics included ôtravel teamsö and ôrecruiting.ö
But the page of frequently asked questions, updated weekly, is the most popular.
Queries deal with telltale signs of poor coaching skills (cursing, criticism of playersÆ characters rather than their performance, inability to take suggestions, constant arguing with referees, allowing cheating to occur, a win-at-all-costs mentality) to handling school officials who protect poor coaches (use a ôparent-groupö approach rather than an ôupset-parentö approach).
Some of the questions are quite detailed, yet the underlying problems sound universal.
One posting involved a school coach who was suspended for verbally abusing a non-athlete, after which parents and players praised his tough approach and winning record. (The answer focused on the importance of not lowering standards and expectations of teachers and coaches for the sake of athletics.)
The Center for Sports Parenting also conducts research. A project now underway is compiling information in such areas as specialization, the odds of a college scholarship, specific problems faced by single parents, weight training, why young athletes quit playing and the carry-over benefits of sports to life.
by Youth Soccer Letter Editor Dan Woog