Well, once again, U.S. Soccer has made a complete hash out of hiring a national team coach. Call it Carlos Queiroz Redux, or Shades of 1995. Once Queiroz firmly told federation officials not to travel halfway around the world to visit him in the United Arab Emirates unless they were prepared to offer him more than handshakes and polite chitchat, D.C. United head coach Bruce “Who’s saying it’s a done deal?” Arena shot to the head of the line. By default, much like in ’95, an American coach would get the job. As Arena should. Queiroz had spent months in this country preparing an extensive report. Couldn’t Bob Contiguglia have formed an opinion about him then? Yes, Contiguglia was elected in late August, by which time an impatient Queiroz had long since departed for Abu Dhabi, but Dr. Bob — in his role as heir apparent — could have made up his mind about Queiroz after meeting with him in the spring. Secretary general Hank Steinbrecher, Dr. Bob’s travel partner, had ample opportunity as well — as a federation executive. Working behind the scenes, Alan Rothenberg and Sunil Gulati stalled so long that Queiroz bolted. Once Dr. Bob was elected, the federation spun its wheels for weeks while dropping hints that a trip to the UAE was planned. Never mind. While the seemingly impotent Canadian federation quietly hunted down a former NASL player who had studied under Franz Beckenbauer, U.S. Soccer’s “extensive” search yielded four candidates any ODP teenager could come up with — one of whom (the jobless Carlos Alberto Parreira) was calling the federation. Could Queiroz re-re-emerge? Sure, if Arena balks, and the UAE gets roasted at the Gulf Cup in early November. Then, it could be another impasse. So, either nail down Arena quick, or hang onto those plane tickets, Dr. Bob.